Five Green Acres Mary Jo + Andrew Borchardt fivegreenacres@gmail.com Poynette, WI
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An almost bag…and our oven exploded today.

An almost bag…and our oven exploded today.
March 12, 2008 Mary Jo

Here is a lovely bag I’ve been knitting since the beginning of time.  When it’s done, it will be felted and will take the shape of a tote bag.  What’s felting?  It’s the shrinking magic that happens when you wash wool in hot water, with detergent.  Or, it’s what happened to the wool sweater that you threw in the wash by mistake and now have hanging in your dog’s collection of sweaters.

In this case, I’m knitting a gigant-o bag, and rather carelessly, I might add.  The beauty of felting what you’ve knit, I’m told, is that all of the little mistakes I’m making and not fixing will shrink and disappear.  How cool is that?   If only we could apply that felty magic to other things.  I am a bit worried, though, that this felty magic will get out of hand and the tote bag I end up with will shrink too much.  It would have been a shame to have spent all that time knitting a coin purse.  We’ll just have to see.  All I need to do is knit the straps and then throw it in the wash…  Suspense.

Ok – the “oven exploded today” line was a wee bit exaggerated.  I have an overactive imagination and it IS my blog.  Here’s what really happened.

It was, in fact, the glass in our oven door that exploded.  You may or may not know that this oven has only lived here for about a month.  Prior to that, we were without a stove for about another month, after the one we inherited with the house decided to throw up the white flag.  So we deliberated awhile and finally ended up handing over our tax return for this shiny new supposed-professional-grade model.  And when it finally arrived, the birds were singing, a rainbow arched across the sky, and beautiful, delicious baked goods poured from its cobalt blue cavity.  And lots of frozen pizzas too, since we had a whole month without to make up for.  (A guilty pleasure of ours and also our “get out of jail free” card when figuring out what to make for supper)

And then, this morning, I decided to try out the handy self-clean mode.  You know, the one where the oven heats to 10,000 degrees and vaporizes the melted butter covering the bottom of the cavity?  Apparently, professionals must not use that function much, and some wise-guy just slapped the “clean” option on the knob to make it more appealing to a lazy don’t-want-to-clean-the-oven-myself sucker like me, never thinking I’d actually use it.

Damn it.  Here’s what’s not coming out of our oven for the next 10-12 days:

more sourdough bread

cookies!  sniff. sniff.

frozen pizza.

And everything else I was going to make for supper.

Back to our trusty little toaster oven.

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